If you are married to an unbelieving husband, but you are in faith, then you may wonder what God wants you to do. We are going to study the scriptures to find out what God says to the Christian wife married to a man who is not in faith.

Unbelieving Husband | Believing Wife

The scripture that most directly addresses this situation is 1 Peter 3:1-6. Out of all of the places in the Bible where marriage is addressed, this is the place that speaks to a Christian wife married to an unbelieving husband.

The text from 1 Peter is the focus of our biblical word study today. 1 Corinthians 7:13-15 also speaks on the topic, so we will look at those verses, also.

All scripture is taken from the Authorized King James Version of the Holy Bible. All word definitions are taken from the American Dictionary of the English Language, Noah Webster, 1828.

1 Peter 3

¹Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; ² while they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. ³ Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; ⁴ but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. ⁵ For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: ⁶ even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

KJV Holy Bible
American Dictionary of the English Language (1828)
Black Fine Point Pens
Tree of Life Journal 

Biblical Word Study for a Christian Wife Married to an Unbelieving Husband

Let’s break down the keywords in the above Bible verses and learn precisely what they mean. Read these definitions and then go back and slowly read the scriptures regarding how a wife should live when married to an unbelieving husband.

SUBJECTION, noun

1. The act of subduing; the act of … bringing under the dominion of another.
2. The state of being under the power, control, and government of another. Our appetites and passions should be in subjection to our reason, and our will should be in entire subjection to the laws of God.

WITHOUT, preposition

1. Beyond; not within. Eternity, before the world and after, is without our reach.
2. Supposing the negation or omission of.

CONVERSATION, noun

1. General course of manners; behavior; deportment; especially as it respects morals.

CHASTE, adjective

1. Pure from all unlawful commerce of sexes. Applied to persons before marriage, it signifies pure from all sexual commerce, undefiled; applied to married persons, true to the marriage bed.
2. Free from obscenity.
3. In language, pure; genuine; uncorrupt; free from barbarous words and phrases, and from quaint, affected, extravagant expressions.

ADORNING, participle present tense

1. Ornamenting; decorating; displaying beauty.

MEEK, adjective

1. Mild of temper; soft; gentle; not easily provoked or irritated; yielding; given to forbearance under injuries.
2. Appropriately, humble, in an evangelical sense; submissive to the divine will; not proud, self-sufficient, or refractory; not peevish and apt to complain of divine dispensations. Christ says, ‘Learn of me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and ye shall find rest to your souls.’ Matthew 11:29.

QUIET, adjective

1. Still; being in a state of rest; now moving.
2. Still; free from alarm or disturbance; unmolested; as a quiet life.
3. Peaceable; not turbulent; not giving offense; not exciting controversy, disorder, or trouble; mild; meek; contented.

SPIRIT, noun

1. Temper; disposition of mind, habitual or temporary …

AMAZEMENT, noun

1. Astonishment; confusion or perplexity, from a sudden impression of fear, surprise or wonder. It is sometimes accompanied with fear or terror; sometimes merely extreme wonder or admiration at some great, sudden or unexpected event, at an unusual sight, or at the narration of an extraordinary event.

Commentary

I do not want to pollute the Holy Word of God with my own opinion. Please do not take my words as the gospel truth, but weigh them against God’s Words. A non-Christian husband has no right to expect you to compromise your faith/convictions. If he sins on his own, that’s one thing, but if he expects you to sin or brings sin into your home, you are to obey God rather than him. His sin should never violate you, your children, or your marriage vows without proper consequences. The elders of the church and/or the law of the land are in place for such cases.

If I were to summarize or offer a paraphrase of 1 Peter 3:1-6 in my own words, I would say, “If you are a Christian wife married to an unbelieving man who is not obeying God’s Word (he is living in sin), then you should intend to win him without the Word – through your godly lifestyle rather than your words. Show him that you are committed to God first and to him second – even if he does not understand the benefits that it brings to his life.

God commands that you, as a godly wife:

• submit to your husband in all things – unless it violates God’s Word (obey God rather than man).
• do not “preach” to him, but kindly rebuke him with God’s Word in love – trust that God will bring Christian men into his life who will speak rebuke, conviction, repentance, and faith.
• live a chaste life – do not try to attract or convince him of repenting through committing sins yourself.
• adopt a spirit of meekness and quietness – be kind, gentle, loving, and humble in attitude and heart.
• do not fear man, stand strong on biblical truth – trust God’s promise to bless you for living in faith.

Additional Scriptures To Study

1 Corinthians 7

¹³ And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. ¹⁴ For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. ¹⁵ But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.

SANCTIFIED, participle passive

1. Made holy; consecrated; set apart for sacred services.

That is an incredible promise! Be encouraged, dear wife, to live in Holy Matrimony – whether your husband does or not.

Philippians 4:

⁴ Rejoice in the Lord alway: and again I say, Rejoice. ⁵ Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. ⁶ Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

¹¹ Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. ¹² I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. ¹³ I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

I welcome advice, encouragement, and help from wiser women than I am, so please comment with your thoughts!

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Buy the eBook! Unequally Yoked: A Biblical Word Study for the Christian Wife with journaling pages.